Well that escalated quickly, didn’t it?

The NBA is in its usual bag of beautiful drama to keep us occupied through the offseason, despite this one being a short one.

So with the draft, aka Prince LaMelo’s christening, upon us, here’s my thoughts on the three teams to make the most noise so far.

1. SUNS ASSERT THEMSELVES
   
   After a literally perfect bubble, the Phoenix Suns put the NBA on notice that their days of being Western Conference pushovers were nearing a close. With their young core, led by lethal offensive guard Devin Booker, the Suns looked to be just one piece away from not only making the playoffs next season, but actually turning some heads once they got there. A veteran presence that would complement their young guns well, and provide stability on a nightly basis, was all they needed.
   
   Safe to say that they now have it, trading Ricky Rubio, Kelly Oubre Jr., and some loose pennies found underneath the couch cushions to OKC for Chris Paul and Abdel Nader. CP3 is just the floor general and closer a young team like Phoenix needs to solidify their offense. Despite this reportedly not being Paul’s first choice, the Suns have instantly put themselves in the conversation of Western Conference heavyweights, with more moves yet to come.
   
   On the flip side, OKC was able to deal away Paul’s gaudy contract and get some young talent (Oubre Jr., Ty Jerome, future first) back in return. The Thunder’s haul of picks is palpable, and with the emergence of Shai-Gilgeous Alexander, this bunch that should be back in no time in their own right.
   
   Also, this being Paul’s age 35 season, this could be it for his hopes of hoisting that trophy when it’s all over. And given the Suns youthful roster, he’ll need to do everything he did for OKC this past season and then some to get them over the hump.
   
   Love it for both, wouldn’t definitively call out a winner or loser of the trade though. We’ll have to see how far State Farm’s finest can take his new club.

2. BUCKS BUY GIANNIS A BIRKIN

Figuratively, of course.

Every dude knows that when they need to regain some favor with their significant other, an expensive gift never hurt. It appears the Milwaukee Bucks are doing just that.

They sent their first and second point guard options and 3-future firsts to New Orleans for two-way stud Jrue Holiday, and came to terms with the Sacramento Kings for a sign-and-trade deal to acquire Bodgan Bogdanovic, whom I have fawned over for the past few years now.

Despite their bench core being heavily depleted in these deals, a starting five of Holiday, Bogdanovic, Kris Middleton, Giannis Antetokounmpo, and Brook Lopez might be the best in the league. Hell of a love note to the Greek Freak, who is the metaphorical pretty lady the Bucks are hoping enjoys her new toys, potentially wins a championship, and resigns long-term next offseason.

It’s a big gamble for a guy who could very much still leave anyway, but at least they can’t say they didn’t try. Like Phoenix, Milwaukee has plenty of time to fill out their roster, which should be much more attractive now to potential ring-chasing vets to sign for cheaper than they would elsewhere.

Again, for a winner or loser of these trades, let’s see how it plays out for Milwaukee in terms of a championship and if Giannis stays or not.

I will say, it seems New Orleans got a very similar haul for Jrue that they did for Anthony Davis, at least in terms of picks; while Holiday is certainly no scrub, he also is not Anthony freaking Davis. On the other hand, Eric Bledsoe and George Hill aren’t Lonzo Ball (future All-Star, won’t be told otherwise ever), Brandon Ingram (actual All-Star), and Josh Hart (versatile, proven bench player).

For the Kings, getting back anything for a guy you would have either had to pay a lot for or lose for nothing is fantastic. Especially considering one of those returning assets is Donte DiVincenzo, who’s ceiling, I think, is really high. But, still the Sacramento Kings, so, there’s that.

3. HOUSTON SWAN SONG?

The Houston Rockets are all but finished. Their once buddy-buddy superstar combo of James Harden and Russell Westbrook both want to get the hell outta Dodge, their former head coach of the year Mike D’Antoni left before being fired, and the mastermind behind it all, Daryl Morey, is gone as well.

They tried to re-reinvent the league by jacking as many threes and possible, and going smaller than even Don Nelson would ever dream of. It was a fun gimmick, but it appears the fat lady is starting some vocal exercises.

Just two years ago, they were up 3-2 on the unbeatable Golden State Warriors in the 2018 Western Conference Finals. And if Chris Paul’s hamstring doesn’t give, our entire existence would be drastically different. The damn center might even be dead right now, for all we know.

But alas, the experiment is over, and although the club has stated that they will prepare as if both future Hall of Famers will be on the roster to begin the 2020-2021 campaign, it appears more and more every day that that will not be the case.

Charlotte and New York have emerged as the front-runners in a Westbrook trade, and Harden’s desire to dismantle all that is holy and join Brooklyn grows by the minute. But so far, all we’ve seen is a Bob Covington deal with Portland, which I really like for the Blazers, who’ve had a revolving door of mediocrity at small forward the past couple of seasons.

As a basketball fan, I’m leaning towards Westbrook to the Knicks. The league is better when the likes of the Lakers, Knicks, and other big market teams are at least relevant. Westbrook immediately shoes them in for a playoff spot in my opinion, despite whatever they do after getting him. And there, Russ can be Russ: a freight train of chaos that puts up 25-9-9 whether you’re up or down by 20, and shoots whether he’s 1-11 or 10-11. Just like old times.

As for The Beard, seeing him in another uniform at this point would be as insane as when we saw Kevin Durant first dawn a Warrior jersey. It would be a shame too, since I really think Houston’s fanbase has fallen in love with him to Yao Ming-ish proportions. But after being thrashed by Golden State for so many years, and the beating the Lakers put on them in the bubble, Harden might just figure a more Eastern horizon might be the move.

Either way, if Harden moves on, the death of the Rockets will be a slow, painful one, as they gave up nearly everything to obtain Russ.

Sources say it’s Brooklyn or bust, but with the aforementioned Morey now in Philly, who might be open to saying goodbye to either Ben Simmons or Joel Embiid, we could see the 76ers get active as well. And, of course, there’s also the chance he stays in Houston, Brodie or no Brodie. Whatever James decides will obviously critically alter the shape of the league, because one of the game’s most gifted scorers ever will be swapping duds.

And my popcorn and I will be ready.

So that’s all for now. There’s only more delicious basketball mayhem to come, and I am ready for it.

I didn’t talk Dennis Schröder because I think I want to wait until the Lakers roster is solidified and do a mega post like last year, doing a quick dive on each player. But we’ll see.

I don’t watch a smidge of college hoops, so I didn’t want to give an uneducated essay of draft predictions.

But I did watch every episode of the first two seasons of Ball in the Family…

…so very quickly, I understand the potential upside, but I don’t see Ball going #1. The Wolves just traded for D’Lo, and although LaMelo’s talent levels exceed his brother Lonzo’s, I can’t get over the negatives. He has some abysmal habits on both ends (as the one breakdown video of his Aussie league highlights I watched suggests), and I question whether or not the maturity is there (which a recent ESPN interview and Ball in the Family suggests).

But we’ll see what Wednesday brings.

I wrote this late Tuesday night to one of those never ending YouTube, “chill/relax music” things. It was a vibe a must say; also, I can’t be held responsible for potential craziness that occurs between now and the morning and is effectively left out of this post, ‘cuz I’m not backtracking.

Too lazy, but you knew that.

Also, none of us can prepare for Woj bombs, emotionally or creatively.

We just endure them, blissfully.

Cheers.