In times of great crisis, I’ve always had a hard time finding the positives amongst the rubble. As I grow older every day, I’d like to think I’m getting better at it, maturing and coping with my emotions.

Like many of you, I find myself having an incredibly horrid go at it today.

Yesterday morning, the San Francisco Giants postponed the unnamed, but obvious, press conference in which the organization would officially introduce its new superstar infielder it had famously acquired in free agency, Carlos Correa. It was reported that something came up during Correa’s physical that they wanted to dive deeper into before proceeding any further.

I reacted to such news without panic. I believe my exact words were, “Why does anything get cancelled these days? He’s probably got COVID or something. I’m sure something came up on the physical due to his recent back issues, but the conference itself is definitely just an illness on someone’s part. They’ll reschedule, no big deal.”

As we all know now, it was certainly a big deal. Or was it?

As many of us have seen, we now know (because all we have are the words of Correa’s agent Scott Boras and radio silence from our front office) that Correa and co. respected the Giants decision to recalibrate, but also respected themselves enough to say ‘Hey, we don’t hear back by this time, we’re going to explore other options.’ They didn’t hear back, and hours later, the Giants deal was dead, and the New York Mets had a new 3rd basemen.

Way too many people I turn to for information and enlightenment on social media, KNBR, or in my daily life do not buy the “something came up on his medical records” line, and I don’t know if I do either. Either way, this entire debacle has left a fanbase engulfed in rage and confusion, and a Giants front office looking incompetent, to put it lightly.

If you believe the medical concern statement, that means Correa’s records, that were out there for any and all to divulge ad nauseam, weren’t looked into deep enough and someone exposed a complete disconnect on what is or is not a red flag to the Giants’ brain trust. It certainly wasn’t red enough for the Minnesota Twins, who came in 2nd for Correa (now 3rd), unsuccessfully offering him 10-years, $280 million, and absolutely is not a factor for the Mets.

If you don’t, the only explanation is they got cold feet and changed their mind at the 1-yard line. Which raises even more questions: Why did we change our minds? Who changed their mind(s)? What could have possibly come up to throw away everything you did to make this deal happen? WHO CHANGED THEIR MIND AND WHY?!

Well, that somebody was not Carlos Correa. The man was in San Francisco, already dressed for the presser in his hotel room, when he received the news his day in the limelight was cancelled. Per Giants Twitter’s finest, he had also already followed every available personnel on Instagram, and changed his Twitter header to a great aerial shot of Oracle Park. Which, to me, is the most gutting thing about all of this.

Unless all this is tabloid conjecture to drum up drama…certainly seems like he wanted to be here. The fans finally had a face to point towards. A top dog. A star. One they could cheer for for the next decade. One that would make star plays, lead the clubhouse, and either usher in a new era of Giants, or lead the current to glory. That’s what SUPERSTARS DO. It also happens to exactly what this team needs DESPERATELY.

And it didn’t happen.

And it’s hard to not sit here typing this and feel like someone upstairs at 2nd & King took it away from us.

Fans have every right to feel whatever they are feeling. And, as someone who had season tickets the past 15 years, I can’t deny boycotting games or plummeting attendance to make a stand. It all seems like an appropriate response for some of the more passionate bunch of the this Giants fanbase after what appears to be the most grueling offseason for a group of people in recent memory, across sports.

To no fault of the Giants, Aaron Judge, the poster child of our offseason dreams, was a Giant for 10 minutes because of a bum Jon Heyman tweet, and he goes back the Yankees instead. While that stung on a more meme-ful level, it certainly is salt into this wound, as the Correa deal was the Judge dream coming to fruition in a lot of ways. And now, in the blink of an eye almost, we leave once again without the star our front office promised us they would chase when they took over.

I mean, how can you garner any kind of positivity towards this team right now? This is the kind of thing a good amount of fans will not come back from, unless something major happens. I want to remain hopeful, but gosh, this upcoming season is not going to start out well, to say the least.

In the grand scheme of things, the Giants wouldn’t be competing for the division, regardless of Carlos Correa or Aaron Judge. I don’t believe fans even intended them to either, though. As it’s been put many times this offseason, Giants fans just wanted something. Something to be excited about, something that showed us that the franchise was committed to staying in the mix, no matter what the southern California teams cooked up. And any one of the free agents they’ve whiffed on the past 4-5 would have done just that, perhaps none more than the wildly athletic and charismatic Correa, who also had the hardware to back it up. But again, in terms of actually winning the West, there was still a definitive gap between the Giants and the Dodgers and Padres, and so it remains.

The additions of Sean Manaea, Ross Stripling, and Mitch Haniger remain fantastic signings for the ball club, and I hate that everything going forward for those guys will all be under the microscope of them not being Carlos Correa. No matter how much personal success those guys have simply won’t fill the pain from what’s happened. Moves are definitely on their way; is it a smattering of 1-2 year deals amongst the likes of returners (Evan Longoria, Brandon Belt, Adam Duvall technically) or newbies (Jurikson Profar, Wil Myers, Michael Conforto)? Who’s to say. But this is probably the lowest point in my Giant fandom existence.

I share in your pain; I still have to delete the Correa portion of the outline for the big post I was drafting for the official end to the offseason. And let me tell you, I gushed over this guy for like 10 lengthy paragraphs. But the good news is, when you’re at your lowest point, there’s no where to go from there but up.

So although this will be the first season you may not actually catch me at the yard, and you may or may not have read some tweets from me using very, choice, language directed at our Giants organization, just know I ain’t quittin’ them just yet. And neither should you.

(But if you did, I get it, man.)

We all dreamt of a Correa bat flip against the Dodgers, on a moonshot that’s puts in the nail in the coffin late in a big game, or even a playoff game. All while wearing a beautiful orange jersey. And we may still very well get that.

It just won’t be our orange.

For all the optimism and levity I’m trying to leave you, trust me when I say we’re all in agreement:
This was very, very bad.

Cheers.